Mr Burns AKA Mr V

I was in class a few years ago and my instructor at the time said that he went to the same middle school as I did, and spoke of a teacher there and his name gave me the shivers. He told me this man was his health teacher and one day he was teaching everyone the importance of deep breathing, but my mind locked onto one class day where he completely freaked me out and so what I remember of this man was a bit more eerie than just some fucking breathing.

Before I go on, I want you to think about your past teachers and if any of them freaked you out or just left you with an odd feeling. Well this teacher did just that for me. I've had a few others, like this one named Mr M. (for now) that couldn't let go that Elvis was dead, you could tell by his quaffed head. Always wore the tan slacks that were tight in the front with that ugly ass, cracked leather jacket, and would fucking switch down the halls when he walked and wore these black shades indoors. The funny this is that when the other teachers saw him he would wink at them and they would shake their heads with this mocking smile that was so obvious to everyone else but him. One of the main things that he was known for throughout the school was that during movies he would pick his nose and put the winners in his beard.

Anyway I am getting off subject and thats a whole other story, but this teacher one took 1st place in nastiness. Now this wasn't some private school it was just regular ass public school, and I know that plenty schools had more pressing matters, like teachers that were having sex with their students, but this is my story.

This dude, and I'll just call him Mr. V. was tall as I remembered him maybe it was because I hadn't finished growing, but he was tall, gangly and odd looking. He was balding, and his shoulders hunched (funny that little kids used that terms for sex still kills me, *hunching*) and he almost never smiled. He had this odd cadence to his voice to, almost like he was sick of it too. Almost sounded like it was an out of tune horn, envision Mr. Burns from The Simpson's cartoon and you'll have a pretty good picture of him.

This was 8th grade and around this time where I was still struggling with the idea that Boy George was a man (Yes I know that was a very, very slow observation) as my mother so lovingly tried to get me to see without laughing her ass off at me. Well Mr. V. forbade us to bring our own dry towels, now at this time I didn't understand the logic behind this, but this was still with how things go when you're young if someone of authority tells you to do something you just do it, so everyday when class was over and we all took a shower, he had all of us stand in a crowd and wait to be handed a towel.

This one day, after we finished showering and he takes his sweet time to the supply closet to pass out the towels, he makes his way through all of naked, wet boys and opens the door and passes out towels. I can remember going to my locker and drying off and there was some joke going on and we all laughed and I had an urge to use the bathroom and on my way back to my locker, I have to pass by Mr. V's office and he wasn't in there, and I kid you not, there were a pair of draws lying on the floor. We knew he had a bathroom in his office, but I thought why the hell are there some tighty-whities on the floor and he is no where to be seen?

Well I brought this to the attention of the everyone else in my circle and they all started giggling and when I finally caught on, I wasn't laughing. What if this man is in there envisioning having me in some sickening compromising position? All I thought was hells naw. We didn't put too much stock in it though, we all made some comment and went on with our day.